Many say that money is what matters.
Others claim that if you are confident enough, you will get anything you want from life.
And there are also the ones who affirm vehemently that if you have the right attitude, then sooner or later you will win big.
Couldn’t agree more: money solves 80% of your problems and, if you are confident enough, and also have a positive, assertive attitude, you will attain extraordinary things that most common mortals can not even dream of.
Add to that consistency and persistence, and you will become a superhuman.
Well, not so fast…
Because there is a very underrated factor that very few people talk about: and that’s timing.
Have you ever seen these guys who always seem to get it right, while others screw it all the time? Surely you have, so today I want to dive deep and try to break this mystery down – to then tell you how you can use it to your own advantage.
Because even if luck by itself exists, it can’t explain everything. After all, if someone gets his chances favorable most of the time, while others simply screw it 9 out of 10 times, then the former either has regular access to privileged information (and so it’s just a rigged game) or is simply better at making decisions than you and me.
Let’s pick up Felix, a successful guy in his 30s who seems to have always made the right choices in his life. Career, business, money, women.
He chose an engineering degree that allowed him to make a lot of money in the initial phase of his career. With this money, he invested in the stock market and within 5 years multiplied his money 10 times. Not to mention he was one of these clever guys buying crypto in 2019 and 2020, while everyone else was believing that “it was dead”.
And then you have Johnny, who spent his whole 20s chasing after women while dedicating little to no time to his career or any other entrepreneurial endeavor. Sure, he slept with a lot of cute faces but, instead of planning his future, the only thing he cared about was to live the moment. YOLO.
Fast-forward ten years and right now he has a regular job (where he feels miserable), no savings, and when he decided to invest in the stock market and crypto for the first time, the market had already topped out and within one year he saw his $10k investment becoming $4k.
The explanation is easier than you think
So why is Felix so successful and Johnny such a loser? Although I believe luck still plays a role, the simple answer is that people like Felix are incredibly aware, and masters in seeking the best knowledge and peer association.
Let’s start with the former: awareness is your ability to see beyond. When you find yourself in a certain situation or moment but that doesn’t become your whole reality. Sure, it is important to be mindful and to live in the present, but it is equally important to plan your next step(s). To use a common idiom, to literally be one step ahead.
In my 20s all I cared about was to enjoy the moment. It did not matter where I would be in ten years, not even in five. Just where the next party or where the next trip would be. The result? I did not build anything meaningful or relevant during that time, and I reached my 30s broke and feeling miserable.
This leads us to the second point: knowledge and peer association.
Let’s say that in my 20s I had a group of colleagues who started talking about Bitcoin and about this new technology that was about to change the world. Even if my awareness was at a low level, at least there would be new information being added into my brain, and perhaps something would *click*.
The same with having a close relative or someone close who was a businessman and could instill the seed of entrepreneurship in me. I guess I won’t ever know whether I would be wealthy by now but, if we look at most successful guys, the truth of the matter is that they are constantly exposed to things or people that show them the way.
We all like to hear stories of guys who built an empire alone and started with nothing, but the reality is that success becomes much easier, more direct, and quicker if you grow up surrounded by successful people. We are a product of our environment, and whoever says the opposite is either lying or a moron.
By now you must be wondering ‘Right, but I did not have any of the two factors mentioned above, so is there something I can still do?’ Is there any hope left? Yes, there is. You just need to be 100% intentional about it.
Things will never be given to you on a silver platter, not even close, so now is the moment to start defying the odds, and put yourself in a position that you’ve probably never been before in your life.
A position of power, where you can kind of predict what is going to happen.
So in practical terms, what does that mean to the different aspects of your life?
Work and career
Let’s say you want to talk with your boss about something important.
Maybe it’s about that raise at the end of the year.
Or perhaps you would like to start working from home.
Or you may want to discuss the new position that opened in Colombia, a place you would love to work and live, unlike the rainy shit hole you find yourself in, and has been draining your energy for years.
So your boss comes into the room, and you suddenly go towards him because you want to sort out things quickly. But maybe he’s heading to a meeting and he won’t even listen to you.
Or perhaps he has a couple of important emails to read and answer, and you won’t surely be his priority (you may even get a rude answer from him, saying that he’s busy right now).
Or who knows if two visitors from the company’s headquarters in the US aren’t coming to the office, and he needs to take a tour and be with them the whole day.
So in all of these examples, you will be much better at postponing your talk (yes, it will make you anxious and impatient, but isn’t patience one of the best virtues a man can have?).
So now imagine that, after lunch, you find your boss relaxed, sitting at his desk. Or perhaps you two are having lunch together with other people, but the atmosphere is quite informal and everyone is having a good time.
Well, that will probably be the best time to come up with that conversation (even better if you are at any event and he praises your work). Because, unlike all the situations mentioned before, he’s now in a position that he will actually listen to you.
The other day I spotted a very hot chick (she looked Brazilian) working in a stand at a tech fair. If you follow most of the “PUA” advice you read online, you would probably hear ‘just go for it man, don’t think twice’.
Well, even if it theoretically makes sense, in the real world that rarely works. First of all, she was working. Then, most of the time she was surrounded by other people (mostly male colleagues).
So imagine I would have gone there in one of those situations and would have tried to strike up a casual conversation with her. It would have at best felt awkward or weird. Not for me, but for her – and you know how women care about social dynamics – and the outcome would have probably have been negative.
However, I noticed that once in a while she was leaving the stand and taking a walk around, having some kind of break. But even in this situation, approaching her when she was moving was most likely not the best of the decisions either.
Until there was this moment where she stopped, alone, looking at her phone. And bam, there was my opportunity. And yes, I approached her and I got her number, not because I am a master of seduction, but simply because I was able to assess the right time to do it.
So let’s say you spot a very hot blond while going out. You look at her and she is exactly your type. However, you see her in a nightclub, and that means that she will be approached every 5 minutes.
And by the time you go talk to her – even if your style and confidence are on point – she will be so fed up of having guys talking to her that she will probably tell you to fuck off. No chances, no second thoughts, just the realization that you are just “another one”.
But what if this girl goes to the bar alone to ask for a drink? Now you have a much better opportunity to go talk to her.
Or imagine you spot her alone on the street, waiting for a bus. She is now relaxed, not even considering that anyone will ever interfere with her peace and come and talk to her. So by the time you actually approach her, you will be the ONLY one doing that.
The guy who was different enough to break conventions, and had the balls to go talk to her.
Any mundane situations
Let’s say you want to buy some nice new clothes. It’s Saturday and…everyone has made the same decision as you. In addition, there are also some sales going on, so the affluence of people to shopping areas is huge.
This means that when you hit the shopping center you will get stuck in traffic for more than one hour. And when you finally park your car, you will find so many people shopping around that you will need to walk slowly and carefully, so that you don’t bump into anyone.
By the time you enter that store you had planned to go in the first place, the shirts and trousers you had in your watch list are not available in the size and color you wanted anymore.
So you leave empty-handed and frustrated, while still losing another hour until you finally reach the comfort of your home. Three hours wasted in vain. This precious time that will be forever gone, all because you failed to plan things properly.
Now imagine you had planned to go shopping on a Monday afternoon during a work break. Instead of three hours, it would have probably taken you a maximum of one hour to do everything, including buying all the items you had planned to.
And in the evening, when meeting some friends for dinner and because you look so cool in your new outfit, a cute brunette starts making eye contact with you, until you finally go talk to her and ask for her number.
A couple of days later she ends up on your bed and the sex is one of the best you ever had in your life. All because you used your head to THINK and made a simple, right decision of going to the shopping center outside its busiest times.
A decision that opened new doors – the kinds of doors that always stay close to most people, simply because they don’t plan anything.
Money and life decisions
When we think about making decisions, we usually overlook this very important element that makes all the difference between losing and winning.
Between being a failure and succeeding in life.
Between earning money, being in shape or getting a girl’s number, and getting bankrupt, injured, or rejected.
When you face most of your life situations, even if luck and persistence play a huge role in the outcome of everything we do and spend our time on, there is a factor that is usually overlooked: WHEN we (decide to) do them.
Let’s say you are thinking about buying a big house so that you can move with your wife and have enough space for your future kids. However, because the city you live in is filled with tourists and expats, and also because the times are quite stable in general, the housing prices are inflated.
And so, you end up paying 900,000€ for an apartment with 3 rooms in the city center. Six months later, though, there are some rumors that the real estate market has some very shady things going on.
Three months later, this news is confirmed, and guess what happens? Another economy bubble bursts and, what was before a paradise for homeowners, becomes now a nightmare with their assets being worth three times less. Sounds familiar?
This is the same lack of awareness that leads people to buy stocks at a market all-time high or to buy cryptocurrencies when everybody is fomoing in. Until you wake up one day and realize how your “savvy” investment is now worth 90% less.
So when it comes to money and investments, always take a step back, and look at the big picture. I know you want to get your business going but, if you start hearing some news about a highly contagious virus showing up in China, you might want to put things on hold. The same with any other investment, or when too many people are earning too much money.
At the end of the day, there is a reason why traditional advice like ‘Be Fearful When Others Are Greedy, and Greedy When Others Are Fearful’ is so popular: because it is a perfect mirror of human behavior, and therefore something you should have as a guidance to all your investments.
The above situations have always happened and will keep happening to most people for eternity. Why? Because they fail to get outside of their own needs and see the world as it is. Because they fail to stop for a moment and see the big picture. Because they fail to look beyond, to be aware.
So if that’s you, now you have the chance to change the course of events. Regardless of how many mistakes you have made in your life – and I guess that if you are still reading this you have made a lot – you still have the opportunity to turn things into gold, instead of turning into crap everything you touch.
Regardless of whatever the situation is, always take a second look at it. No, that doesn’t mean to overthink (which can be a very common mistake for people who have made too many mistakes in their lives), just to take a deep breath and look at things from another perspective.
To question yourself, observe, and think, and then ACT on that second thought, having now a much broader perspective. Sometimes you just need that storm to calm down so that you can go outside, whereas going outside ten minutes before would have made you wet and ruined your day.
And if along the way you can associate with people who always seem to get it right, the better. This is will always be a lonely journey, but that doesn’t mean you must be closed in your own bubble.
That’s also part of the awareness: to understand who is on his way to success, or who will always be destined to fail.
Because if you become truly conscient of things, you will get yourself on a track that will “magically” bring you more positive outcomes than before. But trust me, it’s not magic: it’s just you being brighter, more aware, and making the right decisions.