In 2007 I went to Poland for the first time. And it changed my life. One year before, Brazil had been the turning point which had given me a complete new perspective of social dynamics and female attraction. But it was Poland that took this perspective to a whole new level – especially because it was in Europe, where I lived, and not on the other side of the planet.
During those four days, I experienced genuine interest and looks from many different women. I felt young, powerful, and refreshed, thinking how I had finally become “visible” among the opposite sex.
When you are a young guy living in the West, you will find very few reasons to smile: after all, there are a lot of quality guys competing for – not that many – quality women who, on the other hand, end up becoming more entitled than the queen of Sweden.
But the times have changed. And being here talking about 2007, or anytime before our current time is a vain, useless exercise. Because while remembering the past is good, living in the past is the worst you can do to yourself. It will keep you a never-ending, sad spiral of stagnation.
So that is why it is important to talk about the NOW, these times when being a foreigner or a tourist no longer matters (as I said in previous articles, it can even work against you). What matters is her phone and what she sees in her phone. Are you attractive? Who cares. Do you have at least 10,000 followers on Instagram? Now we’re talking!
We live in a (too-much-comfortable) era when smartphones have taken over, and women are so connected to them that these small devices have become part of them. In 2021, you take her phone away and it is like you are taking a part of her soul.
But while this phenomenon is universal, there are countries that have been more impacted than others. Places where people base their live so much on their online presence and social media, that they somehow forget about what real life – and real connections – are about. And my friends, Poland is one of those countries.
The sad truth
Smartphones have brought great convenience to our lives, but also many negative effects. To men, they have led to lack of focus, to excessive laziness and, in many cases, to having their neediness levels shooting through to the roof.
On the opposite side of spectrum are women, who have clearly been reaping the rewards of this “trend” which is – and this is the most worrying part – now ingrained in their subconscious mind. For the first time in history any woman who’s above 4 (yes, it’s that sad) believes she has endless options and men to choose from.
I am of the opinion that if nothing drastic (read a global conflict or war) happens this reality will soon become irreversible. This means, in practical terms, that the Pareto law will be stretched to absurd levels, where 0,1% of men – the ones who are in shape, rich/powerful/stars, and have a strong social media presence – will get 99,9% of women.
So but what is the current state of affairs? Does this mean that women won’t be interested in the average guy? Let’s break it down bit by bit.
First, if you are really an average guy, with an average body, style, height, interest and/or charisma, it means exactly that: that even 6s won’t be interested in you at all. If she can have an endless string of “above the average” men online, why the hell would she give you any chance?
That is why you MUST have something to offer, something that most guys don’t have. This means ideally that you must be in shape, have a killing style, be high energy and have a lifestyle that is compelling to her.
The good part is that you can do those things irrespective of women. As a matter of fact, you should do them as a way to improve yourself as a man and as a person, not because of women. The latter becomes then a byproduct of what you are, not a reason for being.
So the sooner you get in shape and become more interesting (by traveling, reading, meeting new people and going through varied experiences) and more valuable (especially through social status), the more women will start considering you as an option.
Because if you expose yourself to new things and you improve yourself, the more confident and high-energy you will become (unless you are SO MUCH into self-improvement that you actually forget to eat and sleep well, leaving you completely drained at the end of each day).
And being confident and high-energy are, by far, the two factors that will automatically make you more attractive to women.
Considering you are taking care of these basics, then you will get on the female radar. You become an option. So is that the end of the story?
Of course not. If there is one thing that spending 10 days in Poland has taught me is that being a high quality man won’t change the fact that women’s attention span is at an all-time low. Not only their attention-span, but especially their interest span.
The current reality and what to do about it
Let’s take Poland as the prime example. First, women are in the marketplace not necessarily because they want to find a guy, but because they want attention. They want to kill boredom. They want to be entertained.
While any guy out there installs Tinder or approaches women on the street with the ultimate goal of getting laid, most women on the other hand just do it just for the sake of it. And Polish women take this behavior to a whole new level.
From all my experience with different women from all over the world, Polish women remind me a little bit the Lithuanians: they enjoy more the idea of game, than the game itself.
I know the world nowadays is very globalized and chicks tend to behave in a similar way everywhere. But there are still cultural, social and even genetic factors that differentiate them from one another.
For instance, my experience with Latinas tells me that even if they like to play a lot of games, they are still very sexual beings and so, when they start an interaction with a guy, they also have sex in the back of their mind.
With Russians or Ukrainians, they actually enjoy the process of dating and, even if they tend to postpone sex as much as they can, they also consider it seriously if they like the guy.
Balkan women, for instance, have strong personalities and are very straightforward, meaning that either they cut the interaction/conversation in the first place or, if they engage in it and take it further, they will eventually end up in your bed.
And let’s not even talk about Nordic women, who treat sex almost as a hobby, and therefore tend to make it happen very fast (even if they may ghost you the day after).
But with Polish women it’s like you are interacting with children who don’t really know what they want. They are predictably unpredictable, meaning that in one way or another most chicks you start any sort of communication with will eventually – most times even suddenly – disappear from your radar.
It may be me, but I don’t remember having so many women showing interest in one moment, to then completely vanish in the next one (and we are talking in many instances about just a day, sometimes even some hours later).
While being first in Warsaw and then in Sopot, I must have had at least a handful of VERY good leads, coming mostly from women who gave me the best possible IOIs (indicators of interest) you can think of, whether that being dancing with them “passionately” on the dance floor, staring at me at the bar or approaching a group of girls in a train who insisted on having my contact.
But the day after? ALL of them simply “disappeared”, meaning that they simply did not reply to my last text anymore. And just for the record, I sent messages like “let’s meet now/tonight” and just deleted their number afterward, so there was no risk of becoming needy and texting them again.
So what to do with Polish women – or with any other women who behave similarly? The first solution is easy: get the hell out of there. As I said before, women still behave differently according to their nationality and if you somehow don’t connect with women in a certain country, then I strongly recommend you to move to another one.
However, if you still like the country for other reasons – which you SHOULD, as women should always be a byproduct of your life, not the end goal – then you must stop going there as a tourist. Nowadays, it is ok being a foreigner LIVING in another land.
But being a tourist? It will only label you as another sex tourist, and almost no woman will take you seriously. Remember, this is not 2007 anymore, so being texting girls with your Italian Whatsapp number and from your hotel or Airbnb will most likely be a waste of time.
Therefore, the only viable solution is to start living like a local. First of all, you will not have the pressure of time. When you are visiting a place, you want everything to happen right here, right now, and so you are basically relying on luck for things to happen. Moreover, most girls will sense that you are rushing and will most likely next or ghost you (just call it a “defense mechanism”).
On the other hand, if you start learning the language, going to places where the local people go, and start joining a couple of activities where you will be a REGULAR – for instance, a salsa school, where girls will see you in the school and in parties on a regular basis – you will increase your value.
Not only increase your SMV but especially make people/women gain trust in you, and familiarity with your presence (especially when you join activities where you meet them regularly).
Does this means girls won’t ghost you or flake on you? No buddy, they still will and from what I experienced during these ten days in Poland that will probably happen a LOT. However, you will also have many more success stories compared to talking to Polish chicks as a tourist.
As I have said before, times have changed and the ones who don’t adapt will not be able to survive in this modern, ruthless world. It is true that Polish women are not what they used to be and we all wish they were different: more reliable, more interested, and more curious about guys like us.
But they aren’t. So instead of living in a parallel world, just accept reality, and simply do everything under your control to get the best out of it.